Many older men come to Southeast Asia looking for love after relationships back home didn’t work out.
Every story is different—and to be fair, plenty of those past relationship failures involve mistakes on the men’s side as well. The bottom line is that they are not together anymore and are happier!
As a single man who has never been married and has no kids, it’s fair to say I’ve often been the common denominator in relationships that didn’t work out.
This blog is written from a man’s perspective and life experiences.
So, buckle up, if you’re a fragile liberal buttercup!
Life here in the Philippines is simply different. People tend to value the essentials more—health, family, loyalty, time together, and making the most of what you have, as there are often very few material items.
And that alone can create a completely different world of expectations.
Most of my closest friends and family married their high school sweethearts, which is so awesome.
They started from the ground floor together—figuring life out as they went, building careers, homes, and raising great families along the way. Almost all of them are still together, too!
Sometimes they make tongue-in-cheek comments about how my life turned out. In many ways, they can’t relate.
“How can you live without kids?”
“You need to get laid more.”
“No one wants to live a life like you.”
“You need to adapt to her needs.”
Some of it is joking, some of it is probably fair criticism.
But they’ve shared one life path. Through the ups and downs, there’s never been much background noise—just the two of them building a life around one lifetime lover.
And sometimes I wonder… is that happiness, contentment, settling, or a little of each?
I feel it may also be a bit of ignorance of never knowing a different path like mine.
When people ask why things worked out that way for me.
Even though I am not Religious, I say it was “God’s Plan”.
That takes a bit of heat off an uncomfortable truth.
I would have been divorced three times, and, thankfully, marriage was not forced!
That is why, most days, I am thankful for how my life worked out so far …
Dating in the Philippines, it is a whole new life adventure.
A lot of guys have had luck dating on Tinder, so why not right, RIGHT?!
I literally have matched with the majority of the local Tinder population, and at the time of this post, I have over a hundred likes and tons of messages to sift through after a couple of weeks.
Tinder people on these dating sites all have different objectives.
Personally, I’m just looking for a genuine connection with someone I can move forward with during my time in the Philippines and hopefully beyond.
The challenge is sorting through everything else. A good portion of profiles turn out to be transgender, others are clearly working as prostitutes, and a fair number are just plain scammers or people with very different intentions.
That leaves a smaller percentage of people who are actually looking for the same thing I am.
I’ve also been contacted by more than a few absolute weirdos along the way. At one point, I even added a line to my profile trying to filter them out…
I am ONLY interested in WOMEN! NO TRANS or Lady Boys!
That idea didn’t 100% work, so I’m switching tactics.
Business cards.
Used-car-salesman style!
“Now available: **1972 Cadillac—low mileage, classic model, surprisingly well maintained.” 
If someone catches my eye, hand them a card—or if you notice them first, just ask if they’re single… and, you know, not packing a surprise. 
Honestly, it’s kind of nice for us older guys to get the kind of attention we’d probably never get back home.
If these business cards still do not make sense, watch the videos above and skim my Tinder profile again—you’ll comprehend that it can be tough out there.
I am just a shy guy wanting to get a conversation started and knowing what is under the hood!