I have wanted to write some personal background stories since day one of NorthAmericanDarrell.com
Since this will be an autobiography, I need to start getting a bit personal …
You can read my blog on my “Mockumentary” ambitions:
I was introduced to death younger than most people!
Dad; suicide
Sister and her Son (nephew); apartment fire
My only Brother; D&D car accident
All of this happened at a young age while I was trying to figure out life!
I rarely admit it but, death 100% shaped the person that I had become.
I ultimately spend too much time looking for perfect timing due to loss!
“Paralysis by analysis”
Overthinking and an inability to commit!
One term I came across was Limerence.
The more I read about it, the more a few things in my life started making a lot more sense on how my mind is mis-wired on relationships.
When I meet someone, I almost immediately start to fantasize about the future!
I put the cart so far ahead of the horse it is ridiculous!
I am always chasing the next big adventure instead of settling.
I have tried therapy; I always felt like I was the second craziest one in the room with them all wanting me to dig up my painful my past.
My “workaround” is taking care of my body and gummies 🧸
Honestly, I tried the recommendations and it’s not going to happen!
Too long ago, too much pain and it needs to say under the rug!
Take your PHD and stick it up your ass!!
I’m broken but still doing alright, kinda!