You don’t realize how much your mother anchors your world until she’s gone.
After that, everything changes. The world keeps moving, but it never feels quite the same without her in it.
There are so many memories, moments of relentless loss and things that I wish that I could say so many things just one more time.
They couldn’t have been more correct when it comes to me. Since losing my mom, everything has changed, and life has never been the same.
I used to ask her “Are you bragging or complaining”?
I am complaining Mom!
Towards the end, my Mom had a way to be memorable to to everyone she met.
Well, she did tell a fair share of people to kiss her ass too.
She also found a way to be just a little annoying.
Awesome, arrogance, and annoying – we really do take after our Mom!
I wish I knew how lucky I was to have her here in AZ visiting.
(Just knowing she was three hours away in Yuma meant the world).
After I left Canada; I wanted a tattoo of a Canadian Leaf. She never wanted to be left out so she got a tattoo of a butterfly on her ankle for a daughter she lost.
Darlene also had a butterfly tattoo and Mom also got another one on her BIG TOE. She lost her toenail and always hated it so she got a tattoo there! 😂
I eventually covered up my shitty leaf tattoo and got a second tattoo.
“Live life to the fullest” was her saying!
She would often amend it to include her patented “kiss her ass …”
My Mom did not have an easy life. She endured more loss and heartbreak than any one person should ever have to face.
She lost a husband (suicide), a daughter and grandson (fire), a son (car accident), and her closest grandson Ryan to another car accident. I was old enough to see the pain of her losing Ryan and it hurt her so badly.
I just remember her saying graveside: “Its not fair, it’s not fair” 😭
I often wonder how she found the strength to keep going.I always told myself that someday I would try to make it up to her after she put me through Collage.
When she was close to retirement, she used all of her accumulated sick leave to come visit me while I was working in California. Little did I know that first visit would turn her into quite the traveler.
She took a five-day bus trip from Edmonton to Atlanta and visited several cities where I worked, including Southern California, Las Vegas, Nashville, Myrtle Beach, Acapulco, and Mexico City. She loved ot explore and spend my money! 😇
She also made 16 trips from Edmonton to Yuma as a snowbird
Every year I would ask, “Do you want to take the bus or fly?” She would always reply, “Take the bus… but if there’s a cheap flight.”
I knew exactly what that meant: book the flight and don’t forget to request a wheelchair. She didn’t really need one, but it got her escorted to her next gate and helped with her luggage to get to me waiting.
So many stories I can tell …
When I moved to the United States, I dated a flight attendant who was able to get my Mom on flights for next to nothing. I still laugh when I think about her getting upgraded to First Class and acting like such a big shot. She was convinced everyone sitting up there was famous. She would ask for first class the next time …
I could tell stories about her for days—and someday I probably will.
There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about her. The hardest time of year is the six-week stretch right now between Mother’s Day, her birthday on June 2nd, and the anniversary of her passing on July 1st.
People often say that everything changes when you lose your Mom.
They couldn’t have been more right.
